Black hats for men, sheitlach (wigs) for women?
If DovBear and E. Fink consider it bad news that the black hat has become the required identity-marker for Yeshivish and Chareidi men, they should consider the fact that the identity-marker for Yeshivish and Chareidi married Orthodox women can be downright painful, and not only in the wallet.
Shifra discussed this a while back. But Aliza approaches the subject of a married woman covering her hair from two different different angles, that of someone with "foot-tall" (see the comments) kinky hair that doesn't really fit under anything, and that of a person already in pain from fibromyalgia. Sometimes, covering the head can be physically painful. But heaven help the woman who lives in a community that considers her a rebel, non-Orthodox, and/or someone whose conversion should be revoked if she wears the "wrong" type of head-covering or if there's even a rumor that she's been seen bareheaded in public.
Shifra discussed this a while back. But Aliza approaches the subject of a married woman covering her hair from two different different angles, that of someone with "foot-tall" (see the comments) kinky hair that doesn't really fit under anything, and that of a person already in pain from fibromyalgia. Sometimes, covering the head can be physically painful. But heaven help the woman who lives in a community that considers her a rebel, non-Orthodox, and/or someone whose conversion should be revoked if she wears the "wrong" type of head-covering or if there's even a rumor that she's been seen bareheaded in public.
posted by Shira Salamone at 12:09 AM
26 Comments:
I'm not Orthodox, but I don't think I'd make it because I cannot wear a sheitel. (There are other reasons, of course). I do actually cover my hair, but luckily I have flat hair, and it's not as painful for me as for Aliza. I haven't lost any hair, either. I have had people tell me that scarves "can never be" professional, though. I've also gotten raised many eyebrows. I find this strange considering I'm not even O.
Sigh. Shira, you are again painting with too broad a brush. IN my community, very few women wear sheitlach. Hats, scarves, etc., but rarely a sheitl. You need to get out more and see the rest of the world. New York is not all there is.
Also, little known outside those in the know, but a sheitl is an incredible kula (leniency). R. Ovadya Yosef has poskened for Sephardim that they shouldn't wear a sheitl.
I am writing to inform you that there is No codified Halacha that a married woman must cover her hair totally and constantly whenever she steps out of her house.
The Halachah has been MISinterpreted.The true interpretation of the Halachah is as follows:
A married woman is required to cover her hair when she lights the candles to welcome in Shabbat and Yom Tov – lechavod Shabbat ve Yom Tov - and when she goes to the Synagogue, because that is the place of Kedusha.
The Halacha does not require anything more from married women.
This misinterpretation of the Torah is completely Assur, and a TWISTING of the Torah.The Torah must remain straight.
In ancient times, a woman would only cover her hair upon entering the Beit Hamikdash.Similarly for the Sotah-otherwise she would not be required to cover her hair ordinarily, day to day.
It is very important for people to know and realise that when a married woman covers her hair with 'Real Hair' the woman is covering herself with 100% Tumah. This is totally against the Torah.
Nothing could be more nonsensical than for a Jewish woman to cover her hair with someone else's hair -who was not Jewish as well!She can never fully be sure that this 'hair' has not come from meitim-despite any guarantee by the seller.This 'real hair' is doubly and in some circumstances, triply Tumah.
1.It will contain the leftover dead hair cells from another person - however much it has been treated, the tumah is still there.
2.This other person (likely to be a non-Jew who most likely was involved in some kind of Avodah Zarah) may have eaten bacon, ham, lobster etc, all of which are totally forbidden as unclean and non-kosher foods in Halacha.
3.If the woman happens to be the wife of a COHEN, then she is bringing her husband into close contact and proximity with meitim and Tumah Every day, and throughout their married life. This is clearly strictly against the Torah.
There is nothing more degrading and demeaning to a woman than to make her cover her hair FOR LIFE upon marriage.It is an abhorrent practice.
Any man who makes such a ridiculous demand on his wife, or wife-to-be, should similarly also be required by his wife to wear: long white stockings, even in the summer; a fur streimel; grow a long beard; wear a black hat and coat constantly, and cover his face when he speaks to his wife.Wigs-"la perruque"-were merely a fashion item in the time of Louis XIV-they are not for the Jewish woman!
Rabbi Menachem Schneeersohn tz”l, was unfortunately wrong in this instance.He gave the directive that a married woman must cover her head with a “sheitel.”This needs to be corrected.Rabbi Schneersohn a"h, was a Tzaddik, – but on this – he was, unfortunately not correct.
It is extremely unhealthy and unhygienic for a woman to cover her hair constantly.The hair needs oxygen to breathe.A woman's hair will lose its natural beauty and shine, she may have scalp problems, some of her hair may fall out, she may get headaches, and she may end up cutting it short like a man, when she always wore it long, in order not to have too much discomfort from her hair covering.
Do you think that HaKadosh Baruch Hu commanded this of women? I can assure you that He did not.The commmandments are not meant to cause so much repression and oppression in women.Was Chava created with a wig? Of course not! Did she start wearing a wig? Of course not!
Please Wake Up.
Use the spark of intelligence that Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave to you and blessed you with.
And give your wig back to your husband if you wear one.
There is No codified Halacha that a married woman must cover her hair totally and constantly whenever she steps out of her house.
The Halachah has been MISinterpreted.The true interpretation of the Halachah is as follows:
A married woman is required to cover her hair when she lights the candles to welcome in Shabbat and Yom Tov – lechavod Shabbat ve Yom Tov – and when she goes to the Synagogue, because that is the place of Kedusha.
The Halacha does not require anything more from married women.
This misinterpretation of the Torah is completely Assur, and a TWISTING of the Torah.The Torah must remain straight.
1. To all the women who are wondering about the sources:
We have all been created, "Betselem Elokim" - "in the image of Elokim."
This means that we have been given something called "intelligence." The source is the very first Parsha, Bereishit - 1:27. It is time that people use the spark of intelligence and Kedusha with which Hashem has blessed them.
If your rabbi will tell you to go and jump into the depths of a glacier, presumably you would do that too – and give me a source for it?
“According to the Zohar”, I should also be covering my hair with a wig when I have a bath. “According to the Zohar and the Gemara” and all the sources that have misinterpreted the Halachah, and MIStranslated the Zohar, I should also have been born with a WIG on my head.
Those who tell me about their sources which are incorrect, should also tell me about these “translations” and these “sources.”
2.Remember that the Jewish women are very, very holy. They are much more holy than the men. Look at the exemplary behaviour of the women at Har Sinai.
The women never sinned at the Eigel, and so are greatly elevated. Many of the men, unfortunately, ran after a calf made out of a lump of gold – after they had just been given the Torah, and seen the greatest of all Revelations. The women refused to give their gold for the avodah zarah of the men.
The women were greatly elevated after such a wonderful display of Emunah, and they are regarded very highly in Shamayim.
That is why women are not even required to pray. They can pray at home on their own. Nor do women have to make up a minyan. That is how holy the Jewish women are. Men have to pray 3 times a day to remind them of their Creator.
The men are telling the women to put the hair of a non-Jewish woman who may have eaten things like snakes and sharks and alligators, and has worshipped in churches, Buddist temples or Hindu temples : on their own Heads. They had better wake up.
If the men don’t want to wake up to the truth, and the true interpretation of the Halacha, the women will wake them up – whether they like it or not.
3. Many righteous women influenced their husbands for the good at the Chet Haeigel and at the time of Korach.
It was these righteous women who succeeded in bringing their husbands back to their senses.
And because of these great women, the lives of their husbands were saved. Those men therefore turned away from the madness of avodah zarah, and the rebellion of Korach against Hashem's choice of Aharon as Cohen Gadol.
4. Look at the Jewish women in history, and remember how holy they are.
(a) Yaakov, who was the greatest of the Avot, came to marry the 2 daughters of Lavan, Rachel and Leah. Lavan was not exactly a tzaddik. Yaakov went to Lavan, of all people, to marry his 2 daughters – not 1 daughter, but his 2 daughters. Nothing could be greater than that.
(b) Rut, who came from Moav, became the ancestor of David Hamelech.
(c ) Batya, the daughter of Paroh, was given eternal life because she rescued Moshe from the river. No one could have been more evil than Paroh.
(d) Devorah, was a Neviah, and also a Judge.
Women, who came from such adverse backgrounds, with wicked fathers – were able to become builders of Am Yisrael. That is how holy the women are, and how much more elevated they are than the men.
This was never the case with men. It never happened the other way round.
Don't tell me it is holy for me to wear a WIG! Hair over my hair. This is ridiculous!
Similarly, don’t tell me it is holy for me to plonk a permanent head covering on my head for the rest of my life. This is equally vile.
Please Wake Up.
Use the spark of intelligence that Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave to you and blessed you with.
And give your wig back to your husband if you wear one.
5. Remember: Not a single “dayan” or “rabbi” has the slightest bit of interest in correcting the situation for the women. Therefore, the women will have to correct the situation................for ..................themselves.
Whether you wish to accept the correction–which is true–is up to you. Are you going to live by the truth? Are you going to use the spark of intelligence that Hashem gave to you and all women? Or are you going to follow rabbis and dayanim who tell you to wear a wig in a Heat Wave–and you thank them for it as well?
Wow, please give me a few minutes to catch up on these comments. Let me post bit by bit, so as not to get too derailed by answering the bosses' phone in between thoughts.
Lilli, I remember that, at roughly the time that Shifra published her post(s) on the subject of hair covering (at least partly in response to the discussion about this on other blogs), one commenter (I don't remember on which blog) mentioned that she'd found out the hard way that "scarves "can never be" professional." Tired of wearing a wig to the office every day, she showed up one day in a scarf. Her boss took one look at her and asked, "What's that rag on your head?" She never dared show up to work in a scarf again.
JDub, thank you for reminding me not to paint with too broad a brush. I have edited my post to indicate that I'm discussing Yeshivish and Chareidi women.
Deborah, sit tight--it may take me a few minutes to respond to your comments. I will say this up front, though--I sympathize with Galut/Diaspora women who find it necessary to wear wigs for parnassah/income-earning purposes. I heard quite a story on that subject while I was visiting the Lennhoffs two Shabbatot/Sabbaths ago. A female doctor who didn't believe in wearing a wig found that she had no choice but to wear one while seeing patients--otherwise, she spent so much time explaining her head coverings that she couldn't do her job, which was to conduct medical exams and treat patients as necessary. I also remember reading a story on another blog a few years ago in which a lawyer was advised by her rebbitzen to wear a wig in court so as not to jeopardize her clients' cases. Please take the situation of working women into account, and dan l'kaf z'chut, judge everyone favorably/give them the benefit of the doubt.
Sorry, JDub, I didn't respond to all your points.
"You need to get out more and see the rest of the world." The problem isn't mine, it's Aliza's--you might want to post that comment on *her* post. In my opinion, she really needs to live somewhere where she can go bareheaded in public without having her Orthodoxy (or her conversion) questioned, for the sake of her health.
"Also, little known outside those in the know, but a sheitl is an incredible kula (leniency)." I agree, but it might be a necessary one for women who work outside the home, as I mentioned in my previous comment.
"R. Ovadya Yosef has poskened for Sephardim that they shouldn't wear a sheitl." The really annoying thing about the sheitel obsession is that it leaves no room for differences of opinion, not only among laypeople but among rabbis. Is one of the reasons why some Ashkenazim turn up their noses at some Sefardim that some Sefardim women follow R. Yosef's ruling and never wear wigs? Who are we Ashkenazim to dictate to Sefardim and B'nei Edot HaMizrach that they shouldn't follow the rulings of their own rabbinim/rabbis, as if their own rabbis aren't Orthodox enough? It's chutzpah (nerve)!
Deborah, it would never have occurred to me that there might be issues of tumah (ritual impurity) from wearing a wig made with someone else's hair.
"Rabbi Menachem Schneeersohn tz”l, was unfortunately wrong in this instance.He gave the directive that a married woman must cover her head with a “sheitel.”This needs to be corrected.Rabbi Schneersohn a"h, was a Tzaddik, – but on this – he was, unfortunately not correct" I agree. Wearing a wig to work may be necessary in the Diaspora. But wearing one at all times seems counterproductive. If the point is to cover the hair because (there's an opinion that) bare hair is immodest for a married woman, why is someone else's bare hair not equally immodest? I think the wearing of wigs should be a kula (leniency) used for those working outside the home only.
"It is extremely unhealthy and unhygienic for a woman to cover her hair constantly.The hair needs oxygen to breathe.A woman's hair will lose its natural beauty and shine, she may have scalp problems, some of her hair may fall out, she may get headaches, and she may end up cutting it short like a man, when she always wore it long, in order not to have too much discomfort from her hair covering."
I agree 100%. I think it's a shame that, in some of the more right-wing Orthodox communities, head-coverings for married women have become such an identity-marker that women are literally afraid to be seen in public with their heads uncovered, despite the fact that nearly-constant head-covering often results in pain and/or health problems.
1) Ashkenazim look down on sephardim out of racism, full stop.
2) there is no issue of tumah with hair unless it comes from a corpse.
"1) Ashkenazim look down on sephardim out of racism, full stop."
Ouch. Yet another thing to put on the Ashkenazi communal Al Cheit ("For the sin that we have committed") list. There's no excuse for sinat hinam, baseless hatred.
2) there is no issue of tumah with hair unless it comes from a corpse."
Thanks for the clarification, JDub.
to be fair, Syrians look down on Ashkenazim and discourage "intermarriage" with Ashkenazim. And in the old days, Galician Jews, who considered themselves heirs to the Hapsburgs, looked down on Litvaks, and vice versa. Internecine loathing is of ancient lineage, and goes back to the book of Shoftim, when the shvatim all but annhilated Benjamin. And nobody ever liked Dan.
also, there are so many errors in what Deborah said that it's not even worth taking them on.
Shira,
Thank you for your responses!
A: Re: working women.
I sympathise with the position.
1. A person should not be forced to do something against his/her will, which is wrong, and which they know to be wrong. It’s a tough position to be in. Nevertheless, if it is wrong, it is wrong.
2. By doing something which is so wrong (because of social pressures, misinterpretations etc.), a woman will actually be harming herself, c”v, in the process. Physically (with all that hair covering entails) and emotionally.
And if it is wrong, a person will also be hurting their Neshama, c”v. And we have to take very great care of our Neshamot, which are so holy. This is a world of challenge and great test. We all have to be tested, and we are pushed to the limit. We are examined every day. Which way will we choose?
3. We have to pass our tests! Avraham Avinu was tested to the limit. 10 times. He passed, with tremendous Emunah in Hashem. Similarly Sarah was greatly tested – e.g.she was captured not once, but twice! By Paroh, and then by Avimelech. We too, as the descendants of Avraham and Sarah, can pass our own tests.
4. If something is wrong, a woman should firstly be honest with herself. To acknowledge that she will be c”v hurting herself. Instead of hurting herself, she should decide to have more Emunah in Hashem, and be strong. With Emunah in Hashem, she should maintain her position, which she knows is right.
If maintaining her position would require her to face challenges, or discussions, or even c”v arguments, even a change of course – she should keep her Emunah in Hashem, and face those challenges. That is her test, which she has to pass. We have to maintain our Emunah in Hashem at the moment of challenge.
5. If a person does not want to face those challenges, it is like handing in a blank sheet of paper to the Examiner when we get to the exam. It is like saying to the examiner, “Sorry Mr. Examiner! I don’t like the question you gave me! It’s horrible! I’m leaving! I’m not doing it!” And you walk out of the examination room.
The Examiner will say, “Hold on! You can’t do that! You trained for 10 years to answer that question, and you just gave Me a blank sheet? How dare you!” Similarly to the boss at work. If my manager gives me certain work to do, I cannot say, “I don’t like it, and I’m going home!” I will stay in the office and complete the work.
Similarly here.
We have to look up. To Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Look inside the Torah. Open the Chumash. Read a little from the Parsha of the week. We live through each Parsha, every week. And each week, a new Parsha is applicable to our lives. Gain strength and Emunah by reading the words of Hashem. The Torah is eternal.
And come back, and read your question again. Sit down and do it. And with faith in Hashem, we will pass. And with flying colours as well.
6. At the end of the day, a person is doing that which is right and true and correct. Hakadosh Baruch Hu will always help a person. At the end of the day, we have to answer to Hashem. And we stand alone, on Yom HaDin, before the King of all Worlds. What will we say? That we bowed to social pressures? We handed in a blank sheet of paper when we got to the exam? We would be unable to bear the shame. The shame of failure. The shame that we did not choose the truth. The shame that we did not choose Hashem c"v.
7. To those reading with great dilemmas: Choose the truth now. Face the challenges now. Pass your tests. And have Emunah in Hashem. You will feel much better in yourselves. Because when you have to answer to Hashem, you will be clear. You will be able to “stand tall”. There is nothing worse than having shame before the King of all Worlds. When it is too late, we cannot get another chance. We will not be able to get another exam question. The time to answer the exam question is right now. And Hashem is waiting for you to pass it.
So bear the small/large challenges now. That is what you are here to do. And in that way, with each test that you pass, you will gain strength, and rise from one level to the next, in Kedusha.
B: Tumah.
What I have written about tumah is 100% correct. When a married woman covers her hair with 'Real Hair,' the woman is covering herself with 100% Tumah for the 3 reasons I have previously explained. Sources that say there is no tumah, have all MISinterpreted the Halachah again.
You have missed the whole point about COHANIM. Cohanim cannot come into contact with ANY meitim whatsoever. Whichever source has twisted the Torah to say that a Cohen can come into contact with this Tumah – dead hair cells from a meit or a living person – has not interpreted the Halachot correctly. And clearly, those sources have not understood the basic Halachot of Cohanim.
The hair cells are dead hair cells. As they are dead cells, the tumah is still there, however much that hair is “treated.”
I am seriously concerned at the lack of understanding of what Tumah is.
Deborah Shaya, please, no lectures. Also, please show some consideration to women who work outside the home.
I don't think this is a good time of the year to be judgmental. As Pirkei Avot (Verses [Ethics] of the Fathers) says, "Dan l'kaf z'chut, Judge everyone favorably (give everyone the benefit of the doubt.)" Let HaShem be The Judge.
Speaking of showing consideration for working women (in addition to women with health issues), I think we should also dan l'kaf z'chut for Orthodox men who fear for their livelihoods if they wear kippot or hats. Being a Galut/Diaspora Jew is challenging enough already, without every Jew judging every other Jew by head-coverings, or the lack thereof. I think we would do well to remember that this is the season of forgiveness.
oomein! K'tiva v'chatima tova.
jdub,
You answered "oomein".
What is "oomein" jdub?
Do you think it is Hebrew?
What you are saying is gobbledigook.
We are talking about Lashon HaKodesh, jdub. You cannot twist Lashon HaKodesh to how you liked it to sound in Eastern Europe.
In Hebrew, the word is pronounced, "Amein." So begin by learning to pronounce the vowels in Hebrew correctly. "A" is "a" and "u" is "u". Don't mix them up - because Hashem doesn't like the sound of it.
There IS a correct way to pronounce every letter of the Aleph Bet. We are not allowed to change Hashem's Torah.
Drastically changing the pronunciation of any letter is changing Hashem's Torah - and this is something very grave.
Every letter is extremely holy. And each letter has a particular sound - like a particular note. When that sound or "note" is played incorrectly e.g. I play a piano with a hammer instead of my fingers - then great damage is caused - Above - and correspondingly - below.
Shira Salamone, please, no more posts on wigs and "sheitlach" for women. Also, please show some consideration to women who wish to learn how to display a little more intelligence.
"We are talking about Lashon HaKodesh, jdub. You cannot twist Lashon HaKodesh to how you liked it to sound in Eastern Europe."
Deborah Shaya, who are you to say that "Hashem doesn't like the sound" of Eastern European Ashkenazi Hebrew? Where do you get the chutzpah (gall) to stand in judgment of some of your fellow and sister Jews simply because you don't approve of their pronunciation?
I've had just about enough of your self-righteous intolerance.
"Shira Salamone, please, no more posts on wigs and "sheitlach" for women."
This is *my* blog, and I'll write about whatever I choose.
"Also, please show some consideration to women who wish to learn how to display a little more intelligence."
Why don't *you* show a little consideration, and not insult the writer of this blog.
I asked you to leave the judging to HaShem. Take the hint, or take a hike. The only rule I have for my blog is that commenters must express themselves in a respectful manner. I don't tolerate "insult fests" on my blog. If you post any more judgmental, condescending, and/or insulting comments, I will delete them.
For the record, Deborah Shaya, since I get e-mails informing me whenever someone comments on a post of mine, I know that you copied your comments from here to my old "Bewigged: Bothered and Bewildered" post, and, since I've had about enough of your lectures, I deleted those comments.
I just told Deborah to stop posting insulting comments, and now, you do the same thing, William?! Your comment is hereby deleted.
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